Unless you have solid information to the contrary, never assume:
- that your ancestor was not married before they were married to your ancestor
- that your ancestor was not married after your ancestor’s spouse died
- that your ancestors would never have divorced
Many brick walls are made because of the first two assumptions and records are overlooked when people make the third one.
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9 Responses
I’d like to add a fourth scenario: That your ancestor didn’t marry again while still being legally married to someone else. My mother’s parents married in PA 3 months before she was born in 1918. They split up when she was around 3 years old and my grandfather left. My grandmother never married again. My mother never saw her father again until she was a married adult, and (as the story goes) he showed up on her doorstep asking for money. Two years ago I decided to search for him. On his WWII Draft Registration, he listed a woman as his wife, who was not my grandmother. In 1947 he married, in Seattle WA, a woman from NJ. This was NOT the woman listed on the draft registration. I discovered that he died in NJ in the 1960’s and this woman was his “widow”. The point is that 75 years ago there was no method to check if someone was still legally married before they married again. If you went far enough away from the “first” marriage you could lie and no one would know the difference.
I agree. My cousins and I all assumed that our grandfather had passed until his obituary was in the local paper, and the rest of the story came out. Then my gr-grandfather came to the US, got married in Ohio and both marked their certificate as their first marriage. Forgot to mention the children and spouses who were still alive and well.
Is saying you were a sing;e person, never married on a marriage license proof enough?
Probably, but it would depend upon the situation. If there’s no evidence of a previous marriage, then I would take it at face value and conclude there was no previous marriage (using the marriage license as evidence to support that conclusion). Instead of saying the person was only married once, on 2 October 1900, one could write “Thomas Smith and Hester Jones were married on 2 October 1900, where she indicated it was her first marriage.” Then you are stating what the record says.
Thanks Michael,
The only reason I question the validity of the first marriage is my grandmother was 27 at the time she married my grandfather (age 18). She used her maiden name and lived with her father but I have always wondered because in those days she certainly would have been considered an old maid.
It’s possible that it’s all correct. My wife’s gg-grandmother was nearly 10 years older than her husband when they married in the 1880s. They were from the same village in Sweden and I think after he immigrated to the US he sent for her.
I’m guilty of having made the assumption that my 2nd great-grandfather was not married prior to marrying my 2nd great-grandmother. To this day I only have census records listing her as his wife. I’ve yet to find a marriage registry. What I did find, however, really blew me away. Apparently, he was married to someone else, prior. Some family trees have taken that record, and inserted the name of my 2nd great-grandmother, using the record for the ‘wedding’ date. Happily, in my shock — there was a child from this first marriage, who is listed in the family — that I set about the task of trying to discover just what happened. There was a census record that listed wife #1 and the son, but not my 2nd great-grandfather. After a quick question put to other genealogists, this was cleared up. He may not have been home at the time of the census.
Eventually, I found a death certificate for the first wife.
Never assume your records are recorded. Some preachers, justice of peace, etc., are lazy and don’t do their duty. Some elected officials and judges get busy and overlook signing or recording documents. Shortly after you are married or divorced, double check to see if your records are recorded.
The key to finding my 3rd great-grandfather’s birthplace and father’s name was the record of his 2nd marriage, not his first to my 3rd great-grandmother.